Issue #14: You're The Bee's Knees

Plus Chapter 1 of Why Restaurant Reviews Matter

While Pat is away on some golf course during a bachelor party weekend, I’m taking over this week’s newsletter! Here’s what I have on tap for you:

• Literary Libations, plus a few quick-fire recommendations

• Weekend reads

• Chapter 1 of How To Write A Restaurant Review, a series by Edward Barnes and Pat Evans

-Alyssa

(Pat’s Note: Had a rough time getting interviews scheduled during a busy week, but I’ve got a few really fun ones scheduled next week for future issues, so buckle up!)

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Literary Libations

I recently read Where’d You Go Bernadette by Maria Semple, a 2012 novel turned 2019 movie. The book centers around Bernadette Fox, an agoraphobic mother and former architect, and her daughter Bee, an intelligent and devoted middle schooler. When Bernadette’s cup runneth over amidst feuds with moms at school and debilitating social anxiety, she suddenly goes missing before a family cruise to Antarctica. Everyone, including her husband, assumes her dead but Bee refuses to accept that fate for her misunderstood mom. It’s a comedic but shockingly deep story about mental disabilities and the power of mother-daughter bonds.

If you were a fan of Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman, this book will be right up your alley.

Bee’s Knees Cocktail

• 2 oz gin

• 1 oz fresh lemon juice

• ½ oz honey syrup

• Lemon peel for garnish

First, make the honey syrup by combining ¼ cup honey and ¼ cup water in a small saucepan. Heat until combined, then let cool. Combine all ingredients in a shaker with ice, and shake until chilled. Serve in a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with the lemon peel.

Here are a few rapid-fire book and booze pairings for you…

• One Day by David Nicholls: enjoy alongside a Scotch whisky

• Big Swiss by Jen Beagin: consume with a crisp Sauvignon Blanc

• Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfeld: pair with a boozy Arnold Palmer

Weekend Reads

Not booze related, but I love ship wreck stories, particularly in the Great Lakes. Here’s a 130-year-old ship that was just found! (NY Times)

Chenin Blanc is big this year, as it should be. Here’s a guide from the Washington Post.

A guide to Olive Oil, which is way more complicated than is should be. A cool Substack follow too.

Bartenders chat with VinePair about the weirdest modifications people have made to their drinks.

How To Write A Restaurant Review

Chapter One: Why restaurant reviews matter

We’ve all been there before. 

A restaurant has fallen short of expectations. Maybe the service was slow, or the dish was cold. Whatever the reason, a sour taste was left in our mouths. 

In the modern age of quick reactions and instant gratification, it’s easy to run to the Internet and write our complaints. There are a multitude of review sites that allow every Tom, Dick and Harry to wax poetically about their displeasures with a restaurant, a brewery or even a mom-and-pop hardware store. 

As we use the fiery passion in our fingertips to rip into these defenseless establishments, nothing ever washes over our minds about how this might affect the business in the long run. 

In a week, will you remember that Janet the server was having a bad day, couldn’t remember your order, and made a few mistakes? That seems highly unlikely. 

But she might read that review and let it affect her performance for weeks. Worse yet, a simple terrible review because of her mistakes will live on for years, even after Janet has moved on from The Corner Bistro, and that one-star review you felt so smug leaving can crater that restaurant's reputation.